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Wednesday Wink

Wednesday Wink 21 April 2010

photo by Osvaldos Salas available @ davesdougout.com

When you  come to a fork in the road, take it.

The future ain’t what it used to be.

It’s déjà vu all over again.

—Yogi Berra

Wednesday Wink

A turtle was walking down an alley in New York when he was mugged by a gang of snails. A police detective came to investigate and asked the turtle if he could explain what happened.

The turtle looked at the detective with a confused look on his face and replied “I don’t know, it all happened so fast.”

Wednesday Wink 7 April 2010

photo by Peter Griffin

A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: “Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof.”

The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, “There are only nine words here. You could send another ‘Woof’ for the same price.”

The dog replied, “But that would make no sense at all!”

Wednesday Wink 24 March 2010

A scientist and a philosopher were being chased by a hungry lion. The scientist made some quick calculations, and said “it’s no good trying to outrun it, its catching up”.

The philosopher kept a little ahead and replied “I am not trying to outrun the lion, I am trying to outrun you !”

Wednesday Wink – Happy St. Patrick’s Day

There was an Old Man with a beard who said, "It's Just as I feared!—Two Owls and a Hen, Four Larks and a Wren, Have all built a nest in my beard!"

There was a Young Lady whose nose was so long that it reached to her toes; So she hired an old lady whose conduct was steady, To carry that wonderful nose.

From A Book of Nonsense by Edward Lear  (1812-1888).    Well known for The Owl and the Pussy-cat, Lear was the youngest of 21 children who made his reputation as an artist, humorist, and traveler.  

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